Jason decided it would be a good idea to start shit with me yesterday when we were trying to leave to run some errands.
Just showed up at my house, yet again, and started raging like a lunatic.
He literally wouldn't let me get in my own freakin' car && shut the door && leave.
He wanted me to answer stupid && irrelevant questions.
I'm tired of being interrogated by him.
My life && what I choose to do with it is NONE of his business.
He needs to realize that && get the hell over it.
Just showed up at my house, yet again, and started raging like a lunatic.
He literally wouldn't let me get in my own freakin' car && shut the door && leave.
He wanted me to answer stupid && irrelevant questions.
I'm tired of being interrogated by him.
My life && what I choose to do with it is NONE of his business.
He needs to realize that && get the hell over it.
It's been 3 months && he's STILL not moving on the slightest bit.
It's great that he doesn't come to my house every single night, climb through the bushes in the front yard, and yell threats and fucked up shit through the windows anymore.
Nice to take the Cops off speed dial.
But that's about all that's changed.
He still tries to harass me with stupid ass questions, && insulting me any time he can't get what he wants.
It's great that he doesn't come to my house every single night, climb through the bushes in the front yard, and yell threats and fucked up shit through the windows anymore.
Nice to take the Cops off speed dial.
But that's about all that's changed.
He still tries to harass me with stupid ass questions, && insulting me any time he can't get what he wants.
Luckily he can't harass me via txt message anymore, since I have a different phone number.
He won't be getting it.
&& if he somehow gets it from some idiot that I know, stupid enough to give it to him, I will be changing it.
I'm not being subjected to his bullshit any longer.
He won't be getting it.
&& if he somehow gets it from some idiot that I know, stupid enough to give it to him, I will be changing it.
I'm not being subjected to his bullshit any longer.
So anyway, he starts asking me about Michael && I tell him it's none of his business.
&& it isn't.
It's not wrong of me to move on.
I don't HAVE to be with him.
&& I'm not.
&& I'm NEVER going to be again.
EVER.
I'm glad I got away from him.
I never thought I would. Alive, anyway.
It doesn't mean I never cared about him && it was all fake.
It wasn't.
It just means he screwed it up.
Beyond what I have ever experienced before.
I truly did care about him.
I was happy at one point in time.
Everything would have been fine if he hadn't become paranoid && went psychotic.
His insecurities destroyed everything.
His ungrounded fear that I was doing something behind his back.
He's delusional.
That's his own fault.
I got tired of being interrogated every single night.
Being woken up in the middle of the night by him grabbing me by the arm or shoulder or face, and forcefully yanking me around to face him, to be questioned on who each male is that I added as a friend on FB.
To listen to him tell me what a slut I am, how I'm just a dirty skank, how I'm a whore for having guy friends.
Or him going through my phone when I'm asleep && waking me up to scream at me for whatever he found that he thought was wrong.
I missed having friends.
I missed going a single day without being judged && accused of things && screamed at for no reason.
I missed getting through each day without being weighed down by fear--for my safety, literally my life.
You don't realize how much you take that for granted until you have to live without that sense of peace.
&& it isn't.
It's not wrong of me to move on.
I don't HAVE to be with him.
&& I'm not.
&& I'm NEVER going to be again.
EVER.
I'm glad I got away from him.
I never thought I would. Alive, anyway.
It doesn't mean I never cared about him && it was all fake.
It wasn't.
It just means he screwed it up.
Beyond what I have ever experienced before.
I truly did care about him.
I was happy at one point in time.
Everything would have been fine if he hadn't become paranoid && went psychotic.
His insecurities destroyed everything.
His ungrounded fear that I was doing something behind his back.
He's delusional.
That's his own fault.
I got tired of being interrogated every single night.
Being woken up in the middle of the night by him grabbing me by the arm or shoulder or face, and forcefully yanking me around to face him, to be questioned on who each male is that I added as a friend on FB.
To listen to him tell me what a slut I am, how I'm just a dirty skank, how I'm a whore for having guy friends.
Or him going through my phone when I'm asleep && waking me up to scream at me for whatever he found that he thought was wrong.
I missed having friends.
I missed going a single day without being judged && accused of things && screamed at for no reason.
I missed getting through each day without being weighed down by fear--for my safety, literally my life.
You don't realize how much you take that for granted until you have to live without that sense of peace.
HE made things the way they were.
Not me.
How could ANYONE be happy that way?
I put up with his shit for months.
A hell of a lot longer than anyone else would have.
Which made it hilarious to me that he could accuse me of doing things behind his back.
Why the hell would I have stayed with him, if I had someone else on the side?
He had no money, no car.
His work hours were the opposite of mine.
He wasn't that great with Jordan.
He did NOTHING around the house but make messes.
All he did was accuse me of things && scream at me, bully me, and put his hands on me.
I'm sorry but when someone pulls a weapon on you after locking you in your own room, in your own home, you stop giving a shit about their feelings.
What the FUCK could possibly have been in it for ME?
It was all for him.
He's still blind to that reality.
Oh well.
That's his problem.
All I know is, I've had enough.
Not me.
How could ANYONE be happy that way?
I put up with his shit for months.
A hell of a lot longer than anyone else would have.
Which made it hilarious to me that he could accuse me of doing things behind his back.
Why the hell would I have stayed with him, if I had someone else on the side?
He had no money, no car.
His work hours were the opposite of mine.
He wasn't that great with Jordan.
He did NOTHING around the house but make messes.
All he did was accuse me of things && scream at me, bully me, and put his hands on me.
I'm sorry but when someone pulls a weapon on you after locking you in your own room, in your own home, you stop giving a shit about their feelings.
What the FUCK could possibly have been in it for ME?
It was all for him.
He's still blind to that reality.
Oh well.
That's his problem.
All I know is, I've had enough.
The other night he was driving around the entire city of Springfield, looking for me.
He found us at a restaurant && came in && started shit there.
Sat down and pushed Michael over, started interrogating me like an arrogant ass.
It was so embarrassing.... everyone in the restaurant was staring at us, and the staff even came over and asked if I wanted them to have him removed from the premises.
Fortunately his pride caused him to leave before the staff could escort him out.
He's just so insane, its really scary, and really pathetic.
He found us at a restaurant && came in && started shit there.
Sat down and pushed Michael over, started interrogating me like an arrogant ass.
It was so embarrassing.... everyone in the restaurant was staring at us, and the staff even came over and asked if I wanted them to have him removed from the premises.
Fortunately his pride caused him to leave before the staff could escort him out.
He's just so insane, its really scary, and really pathetic.
I guess I needed to vent more than I thought.
Time to get ready for work, I suppose.
Time to get ready for work, I suppose.