Confusion?

Well, this week fucking sucked. But I kind of feel relieved, and I feel like now I have the chance to start fresh. John and I broke up. It needed to happen. Badly. He was never going to start treating me with dignity or respect. When someone minimizes their physical abuse of you, and their emotional and verbal abuse of you, it's time to cut your losses and get out of that situation. He called me "cunt" and "whore" and "slut" like it was my name. I spent way too many nights sitting awake alone, after his verbal lashings. He slept like a baby, while I cried my eyes out, heartbroken. He never comforted me, showed me any affection. It felt more like he was my friend than anything; however, a friend that stomped all over me. His constant criticism of me, but always defending himself and acting like he's perfect and every issue was just me being a cunt, got so old, so fast. Any kind of change is hard, though. Heartbreak comes in all forms. I knew I wanted out of the relationship, but I was dragging my feet. I almost didn't talk to him again last week when we fought. We just were ALWAYS fighting. ALL the time. It got so damn old. He is by far the moodiest -- Didn't finish, but publishing it anyway.